The Mule

Amy Chua's memoir was an international bestseller when first published a year ago, and caused a storm of controversy. The book, a description of her approach to raising her two American children the 'Chinese way', touched personal, cultural and political nerves, with many branding her parenting as abusive and extreme. In the midst of the storm, others noted that nerves get touched for good reason, and that perhaps the Western world wouldn't be in total decline - unlike China - if we all had a Tiger Mother to urge us on. It's not surprising that Chua's book pushed buttons, for her descriptions of the methods she used to drill, coach and shape her children into musical prodigies and academic achievers are at times jaw dropping. Right from the first page she tells of how her two girls were not allowed to attend sleepovers or playdates, be in the school play or get a grade lower than A, but, as the book goes on, she confesses stories which have now become notoriou...

Over the past few days, women around the world have been holding 'nurse ins' to protest at the removal of breastfeeding images by social networking giant, Facebook. It seemed a bit ironic therefore, that while Lactivists were holding a global 'Boob Out', I was busy taking down photo after beautiful photo of breastfeeding women and children from this blog. Slowly but surely, I deleted images from a gallery of Breastfeeding Beyond One , and then from a comic post about nursing in public Boobylicious Baby Feeders  Unique Portable Travel System . And I didn't stop there. I then erased photos from all of the guest posts on birth, and a few extras of parents and children from around the blog. I've already said a little bit about my reasons for taking this action, but I'd like to give more detail in this post. Whilst it may at times make uncomfortable reading, I think it's relevant, not just to this blog, but to all of us who are parents and who, to one degre...

It has come to my attention that this blog is being found in Google by people with the very worst of intentions. Through Blogger I am able to see the search terms that people have used to find this blog, and there are some that give me cause for concern. Unfortunately, it seems that there are a combination of search terms that are leading people who wish to harm children to find this site. Two comments have been left on the blog by such people. They are not publishable.  At the moment, I have no idea of whether this is just one or two individuals, or more. I have contacted the Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre . This blog has, as I hope you know, the very best of intentions, and is run by a person who has extensive professional experience of working with both adults and children who have experienced abuse. I recognise that we cannot always control the way certain images are viewed, and that the internet is full of perfectly innocent pictures that ...

Often we really want to help our children express how they are feeling, but find that our questions are met with silence or a change of subject. In this situation, we might feel that they are not opening up to us, that the lines of communication are broken, that they are keeping their feelings bottled up. We might find ourselves asking,"Why won't you TALK to me?!". But there is something we can do. We can play with them. Through play, we can connect and communicate with our children at an emotional level, in a way that feels safe, natural to them, and fun. Why? Play is a Child's Natural Language Play is the way that a child makes sense of their world. Children use play to process and explore events that they experience, from the day to day, such as shopping and 'mummies and daddies', to the traumatic. Children who have witnessed or been involved in a frightening situation will rarely, if ever, choose to process this by talking about it. Instead, they re-...